Pink Phizz

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Very important read...From the desk of the President of the United States

New Emergency Phone Information

Statement from the White House: Please discontinue phoning 911 in emergencies.

In the wake of grumbling about the poor quality of local and state government response in the preparation, planning and execution of disaster relief post Hurricane Katrina, the federal government today is issuing the following order:

Please do not phone traditional emergency services should your house catch fire or you are in need of emergency services. It is apparent that the first responders charged with responsibilty for providing those services in many areas of the country are unable to meet your needs.

We suggest that should you have an emergency, you contact the White House immediately at this number: 202-456-1414. We have President Bush standing by to take your call. Should he need to go to the bathroom or sleep from time to time, Laura or Dick Cheney will be filling in.

We don't recommend you phone your local or state governments for help, unless those governments are headed up by Republicans, such as Governor Barber of Mississippi, who thus far seems to be pretty darn competant when it comes to handling a crisis and saving the lives of his poorest and weakest citizens.

(Oh, and in case you are a complete ignorant boob, or a devotee of Michael Moore (same thing) the above is a SATIRE!)

Thank you Mike!


At 1:36 PM , Anonymous the letter b said...

could well imagine the shrub doing just that - answering emergency calls. ta for the post, Alice :)

At 2:14 PM , Blogger "Alice" said...

Well, you know, the UK doesn't have the only hold on the title of "Nanny State" we have our own that continue to hold up our section of the trophey too.

At 3:05 PM , Anonymous the letter b said...

actually foreign press don't hesitate to label singapore the nanny state also. they are not off the mark as the natives do turn out to be a tad ineffectual, spoilt and self-delusional. but then again, it could be due to their having an islander mindset.

At 4:12 PM , Blogger Mike's America said...

Alice, last time I was in London, a morning news program was interviewing an older gentleman who kept repeating that the government had promised to "take care of him from cradle to grave."

I was just astounded! There's a similar attitude here fostered by those on the left who have sold the poor a bill of goods promising to make everything all right.

Well of course they cannot make everything all right. Government cannot replace your family and ultimately your God given ability to be self reliant. We all need help from time to time, but expecting help every day from cradle to grave will only lead to disappointment.

At 12:44 AM , Blogger Fred said...

I'll get on the phone right after I make this comment. I wonder if I'll get a busy signal?


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